Lana Del Rey has been hated on by feminists time and time again, because many feel that her songs tend to cast women as the powerless victims who rely on men. Which, in all honesty, they do. Furthermore, while many other celebrities have been declaring themselves feminists (such as Lorde, Beyonce, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, etc.), Lana Del Rey has stated that she is not interested in feminism at all, and has a greater interest in humanity's intergalactic potential.

Does this bother me? To an extent, yes it does. Ideally, everyone would be totally interested in feminism, but that is obviously not the case. However, does this mean I should hate Lana Del Rey? Maybe not.

You see, Lana Del Rey never said that she believes women are inherently inferior to men, or that women don't deserve rights, or whatever. She simply said that the topic itself is not as interesting to her as other things. Her songs may not be as anti-feminist as they seem as well, since many of them seem to be not about women in general, but about her own life experiences. For example, her song "Carmen" opens with "darling, darling, doesn't have a problem lying to herself 'cause her liquor's top shelf," which is likely a reference to her struggles with alcohol dependency during her teen years. If her life experiences were not empowering, why would the songs she writes about her life be? It's like when Stevie Nicks wrote her songs for the Rumours album: her recent experiences were of heartbreak and frustration and general sadness, and so that's what she wrote about when she wrote songs like "Dreams" and "Gold Dust Woman." Rather than empowering women, Lana Del Rey gives voice to the struggles, delights, and experiences of women who are left unable to feel empowered, and that's not any less important.

I feel she even recognizes the need for women to unite and be strong together rather than to divide and compete with each other, since her song "This is What Makes Us Girls" includes the lyrics "we don't stick together 'cause we put love first," possibly to reveal the flaws that often plague female relationships: girls are taught that other women should see each other as competition rather than as friends. Therefore, many girls avoid befriending other females, or blame another woman for the failure of a relationship.

Also, Lana Del Rey offers her own definition of a feminist, as (I'm paraphrasing here) "a woman who can do whatever she wants." She writes her own songs, has her own unique sense of style, designs her own music videos, and voices her own (however controversial) opinions almost without fear of backlash. It may seem that Lana fits her own definition of feminist without even realizing it.

However, I feel that despite everything I just said, Lana Del Rey just isn't a relevant person to bring into the feminist debate. She has admitted that she doesn't know a lot regarding the topic. It's almost like, would you want to bring Beyonce into a discussion regarding nuclear physics? Even though Beyonce is an important person in our popular culture, and despite the fact that nuclear physics is an important topic, it doesn't make sense to bring her into a discussion about nuclear physics because she, being a lifelong performer and not a scientist, likely doesn't know enough about it to hold her own in a discussion regarding such a topic. Lana Del Rey is as relevant a person in feminist discussion as Beyonce is in nuclear physics research, and while both are fabulous, glamorous, and talented women, it doesn't mean they're qualified to take part in every discussion, every cause, every debate. Nobody is.

And that's why I allow myself to indulge in Lana Del Rey free of feminist guilt.

~Abbey xoxo

(Also, her song "Young and Beautiful" that she wrote and performed for The Great Gatsby was what I cried to as I went through a devastating heartbreak and so that must be worth something...right?)

In my early childhood, I didn't question sexism, because I didn't know it existed. I didn't see anything wrong with the idea of gender roles that put women in a submissive position. I watched Disney movies religiously and for the first eight or nine years of my life, my father went to work every day while my mom stayed home, raised me and my siblings, and did the housework. Heck, I even wanted to be a housewife like her. When asked what I wanted to be when I grew up for those first few years of my life, I would reply, "a mommy." There was no rhyme or reason for it, but it nevertheless made sense to me.

Then, when I was about eight or nine-ish, I had something of an epiphany. I was in the bathroom, getting into my pajamas after taking a shower, and I suddenly stopped and thought, "wait a minute...why do women have to stay home and cook and clean and whatnot? Why do the Disney movies I watch seem to always put women in an inferior role?" And all of a sudden, it stopped making sense to me. And that's where my journey began.

It was then that I started to detest wearing skirts and dresses and whatnot for fear of adhering to gender roles that say women should look feminine and whatnot. My aunt gave me a book about great women in world history (a book I absolutely loved and still have because it's one of my favorite books in existence). But I don't feel like my young mind completely understood feminism yet. While I did believe in equal rights for all people, I thought feminism was all about women not being housewives forced to do domestic tasks and not needing a man. Which, in a sense, I still believe, but more to the idea of women shouldn't have to adhere to gender roles they don't agree with, and a woman doesn't inherently need a man, but if she chooses to have one in her life, that's cool, too.

When I hit middle school, I was still a feminist, but I kinda shied away from the term out of fear that I would get made fun of, after finding that my family would lovingly tease me about being a feminist. But I was nevertheless interested in gender equality. I began to learn about the need for gender equality in the third world, sexism in ancient civilizations, the awesomeness of female scientists (primarily Marie Curie, who was absolutely positively my hero in seventh grade), and especially the woman suffrage movement in America during the early 1900s. Woman suffrage became a great interest of mine in eighth grade, so much so that I even submitted a paper on the history of woman suffrage in America for the National History Day contest (I didn't win, but the judges loved my paper anyway).

In my freshman year, I definitely continued to be a feminist. But I still wasn't super open about being one, due especially to the stigma and stereotypes attached to feminism and my fear of being made fun of. I used to avidly read online newspapers, and based on the comments I would write on the women's issues articles reveal to Present-Day Me that I was still a feminist. I spoke out about how gender equality still does not exist, I avidly supported LGBT rights, and signed petitions and wrote angry emails to help support Kiera Wilmot, as she was a fellow STEM girl. I was essentially one of those people who say "I'm not a feminist, but (insert feminist opinion)."

But that all changed in November of my sophomore year in high school. I was bored one night when I couldn't sleep, and so I decided to watch some TED talks, because why not? Since I had recently become obsessed with Fleetwood Mac, I decided to search the TED website for something related to Stevie Nicks. Because, again, why not? What I came across, by total chance, was probably the single TED talk that completely changed my life (Jane McGonigal's talk about playing games that  lengthen your life is a close second place). The talk was given by Tavi Gevinson (who came up as a search result due to her declaration to "just be Stevie Nicks"), and discussed feminism, popular culture, the blog that made her famous, and Rookie. I had never before heard of Tavi, Style Rookie, or Rookiemag.com, but something about that talk turned me back on to feminism.

In the following months since I watched that TED talk, I become less and less afraid of calling myself a feminist. I also began to view feminism in a whole new light: I not only recognize gender roles as an issue, but also rape culture, representation of women in media and pop culture, sexual objectification, wage inequality, etc. Aside from Rookie and Tavi Gevinson, influences such as older girls who were in drama club with me that identified as feminists, reading feminist blogs and articles on the internet, Laci Green's videos about feminism, my discovery of Bikini Kill and riot grrrl, and many other things were instrumental to my development as a feminist.

I have also stopped associating femininity with anti-feminism and oppressive gender roles, and now deem it as an expression of gender. In middle school, I hardly wore makeup, and I loved wearing pants and not putting much effort into making my hair look gorgeous. Now, I love love love eyeliner, skirts, curling my hair, wearing perfume, etc. Because now, I'm secure in the fact that I am a feminist, and wanting to be girly and feminine does not make me any less of a feminist.

What a fantastic evolution.

~Abbey xoxo